Way Beyond Me

"I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength" ...
(but that doesn't mean I've been called to do EVERYTHING!)

One of the most difficult lessons I've been learning this year is about disentangling myself from the burdens that drag me down.

This process is intentionally my New Year's Resolutions. I've got to drop some baggage from this load that keeps me from moving!

I have a really bad habit of saying "yes" when asked to do things. Maybe it doesn't sound like that big of a deal. Trust me; it is.



If there is a function coming up for youth group, or if hubby comes up with another "great idea" for the youth group, or if someone in the church is thinking of an idea for the church family, I VOLUNTEER!

If there is an event going on at school, whether my kids are involved or not, or if someone happens to be absent or called away or otherwise "in need", I VOLUNTEER!

If a friend (or even slight acquaintance) calls needing something, I VOLUNTEER!

It's true. And the weight of all these promises drags me down! So I am learning to say no.

It's a slow process. Right now, I'm working my way through all the previous obligations that I've said "yes" to. The next month or so is full of these types of burdens. And it really is my own fault. These things would get done if I didn't do them. (And if they didn't get done, the world really would not come to an end.)

During this time of stress from over-volunteering, and learning to say no, I repeat Philippians 4:13. And I hum a little of TobyMac's "Way Beyond Me"...

Anything that I got the strength to do
In over my head keeps me countin' on You
I'm leaving the sweet spot, sure shot
Tradin' it all for the plans You got
Is it so crazy to believe

That You gave me the stars, put them out of my reach
Called me to waters a little too deep
Oh, I've never been so aware of my need
Yeah, you keep on making me see
It's way beyond me

2 Lessons from Philippians 4:13

"I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." Philippians 4:13

In this busy school year, I've had to rely on this verse. A LOT. At the start of this new year, a thought struck me. I have learned two important lessons from this verse this year! One lesson I even made my "New Year's Resolution". Sometimes it just takes me awhile to hear God's voice (must be what Lent is for).

So... two lessons from Phil. 4:13.



Lesson One: Just because I can do all things doesn't mean I'm being told to do ALL things!

One of my biggest weaknesses is becoming overwhelmed and over-committed. I volunteer for projects, even though I'm really busy, just because I think I must. I tell myself, "This won't get done unless I do it!" Which of course is just silly, because if it needs getting done, someone will indeed take care of it! Case in point: I volunteered to direct Junior MidWinter Camp. Direct!! Now, my thought process on this should have told me that A) camp would happen with or without me and B) directing was too big a project for me and would stress me out. But I didn't listen. Yes, camp went well. But I was a basket case until it was over!

Lesson learned: don't volunteer for anything unless you REALLY want to. Now, I've still got too much on my plate, but I'm slowly learning that listening to God's voice is different than hearing that whiny self-talk in my head. So I'm tuning out the irritating over-volunteering voice, and tuning in to the Voice of Truth.














Lesson Two: Just because I haven't done something before doesn't mean God doesn't want me to try!

I am an adult, with an adult job as a library media specialist in a small school PreK-12 and an adult position in my church as song leader. Both of these roles call for a professional, adult appearance. But seriously, I just realized it over the past two weeks. Maybe it has to do with being an "adult age" finally (you'd think by 41 I'd have this figured out). Maybe it has to do with opening my eyes to the full impact of Philippians 4:13. I can do ALL things. I can, indeed, figure out how to dress like a professional -- including wearing makeup and matching my clothes and shopping for myself.

Yipe. I had to reread that just now.

What am I getting myself into? I've never worn much makeup. For awhile, when I was helping sell Avon with my mom-in-law, I bought makeup and wore it (though not every day). But I don't think I was very good at it. At the beginning of this school year, I bought makeup and wore it until about October. My reasoning: no one even noticed when I wore it or not, so why bother. My new realization: people do notice, they're just too polite to say anything. And it shouldn't be about that, anyway; it's about a professional image.

The same is certainly true, if not more so, for my wardrobe. I have never ever been good at shopping. I have never been good at putting clothes together. However, I didn't really think anyone noticed. Until a Sunday morning about two weeks ago. One of the older ladies of the congregation pulled me aside before worship started to ask me if I knew I didn't match. Yikes! I guess I didn't really pay attention, but my daughter just shook her head. She knew. And it's not my daughter's job to make sure I match every day or to take me shopping. (I miss my mom-in-law so much -- she was so GOOD at fashion and makeup!)

But I am an adult. I am a professional. I should be able to research and make notes to figure out this makeup and fashion thing. So that's what I've been doing. Pinterest has been especially helpful. As well as Stitch Fix! And so: Tomorrow, I'm going on my first fashion shopping trip, using my research guidelines and prayerful resolve.

"I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength."

(proof I can dress nicely and put on makeup!)












How about a book recommendation: read the Seraphina duo (Seraphina and Shadow Scale). Great for learning about your personal strengths and stepping out to be the person you were meant to be!

Count Your Blessings

♪ Count your blessings, name them one by one,
♪ Count your many blessings, see what God has done!

So, not only did I give up my Facebook for Lent (which is harder than I imagined, thank you very much), but I also vowed to spend more time in Bible reading and prayer. Well, I have the time! You can't possibly imagine how much time I have wasted on Facebook!

Each day, I'm diving into a different book of the Bible. In the mornings, I read; in the evenings, I reread and ponder, meditate and pray, and then write. I also have a cool journaling/doodling page I found somewhere on Pinterest. (Don't judge me; I can't give up ALL my social media at once!)

Yesterday was just a regular day. No mountaintop experiences, no "valley of the shadow of death" moments. And yet, as I read I Corinthians 1 last night, I was struck by just how many blessings God had given me in the course of the day. Verse 5 practically jumped off the page and landed in my lap! I have been given so much! In speech and in knowledge, I grow every day! Even the seemingly ordinary days! After all, life is really made up of ordinary days sprinkled with extraordinary moments.

There's another old song (I'm pretty sure it's Bing Crosby) about counting blessings instead of sheep "Tonight, I'll fall asleep counting my blessings..." ♫

Yep, I certainly will!

Lent (or Giving Up What You Can't Live Without)

This year for Lent, I'm taking a huge leap of faith.

Yes, every year we practice the spiritual discipline of "giving up" something during Lent. And every year, I say, "I can't give up my Facebook! I need it!" Really?! Since when is Facebook something I can't live without?

At Senior MidWinter this past January, the kids listened to a great song, "Clear the Stage" by Jimmy Needham. Toward the end of the song, a refrain of sorts repeats the phrase, "Anything that comes before my God is an idol." And somehow those words finally got through.

I do NOT NEED Facebook -- or anything else, for that matter. My God will supply all my needs, according to His riches in glory. So, I can go through 40 day of Lent, focusing on God rather than the selfish things I think I "need".

I find the Lenten worship service of Ash Wednesday particularly meaningful. Maybe it's because it's quieter than most anything else we do in our church. Maybe it's just more centering. Whatever the case, last night's service was powerful, in a way I wasn't expecting.

We had usual youth group before the service. At the end of youth, right before heading into the sanctuary, we played a short video and then talked about Lent, including all the "giving up" ideas, but also how the Ash Wednesday service is different than a typical "church" service. The last thing I said to the kiddos before we walked down the hall toward the church was to "think holy thoughts". (I'm not sure what that meant, but I guess the kids did!)

We had 28 people at the service last night. 12 of those were kids. The youth walked in quietly, sat in their two rows, and whispered quietly as they looked over the bulletin. My heart was happy. They weren't misbehaving; they were acting like mini adults. (In fact, let's make this perfectly clear, they were quieter and sitting more still than many of the adults!)

There were a few announcements, then the whole room got quiet in anticipation of opening prayer by the pastor. The pastor hadn't gotten up yet, though; he seemed to be waiting for "something".

All of the sudden, two young voices from the back pew began singing. "Lord, prepare me / to be a Sanctuary / pure and holy / tried and true / with thanksgiving / I'll be a living / Sanctuary / for You"

That was a 2nd grader and a 7th grader.

It didn't take long for the rest of the youth to join in! And I've got to hand it to the adults, most of whom don't know the song, they joined in as best they could. It was all I could do to keep from breaking down in tears. Because, yep, that's what it is all about!

They got it. Some of the youngest present at the service got it. They understood what it means to "think holy thoughts". Certainly, out of the mouths of babes...

What a blessing! And what a challenge!

February Formal Dinner

I love the kids in our youth group! They continue to show me, time after time, how amazing they are! We have been blessed with a fabulous group of hard-working young people.

Last night's fundraiser dinner is a perfect example. My husband came up with a spur-of-the-moment idea in January to have a dinner (served by the youth) to help them raise money for summer camp. (Believe me, they need the money; we heard how much more camp is going to cost this summer = yikes!)

So, we crafted this idea. The kids would dress in nice clothes and become the waiters in our "candle-light" restaurant. Hubby served as chef, and made a delicious meal of chicken parm, Italian potatoes, herb spaghetti, plus salads and cheesecake. I dubbed it the "February Formal", so it wouldn't be too "couple-y", and the kids really enjoyed getting dressed up.

We had a terrific turn-out! We are so thankful to all the adults of the church who came out to support the kids. Certainly more than we expected. And such a great response -- several people asked if we could do this again soon! :) I think we will, but we need time to recuperate before trying it again.

The best part of the evening, though, was watching the kids serve. They were sweet, attentive, prompt, and just generally showed the Christ-like attributes we try to teach them in church.

We are so blessed to know these kids, and to be part of their lives.

To top it all off, we ended the evening in the sanctuary at the Ash Wednesday Service. Great to see all the kiddos in church being serious, as well as serving others at the dinner. (Proud!)

Precious Moments

What an amazing weekend! We took 14 kids, grades 1-6, to church camp over the weekend. I know, that sounds crazy, but it truly is an awesome experience!

I wanted to write about one of my highlights from the trip, before I forgot! On Saturday evening, we had a unique worship experience. Each one of the small groups planned and led a portion of worship. My small group was assigned communion.

My small group was a different group -- my kids were the youngest campers there for the weekend. All were in 1st or 2nd grade, with an extra kindergartener thrown in. (Her dad was the other adult leader in our small group, so though she was still a bit young for the weekend, it all worked out.) We also had two high school kids who helped with our small group.

So, perhaps you can imagine what I was thinking as I sat down with the group to plan our part in worship. I find I am always surprised by something new that God has to teach me. Remember that Bible verse that encourages us to "let the little ones" come to Jesus? Sometimes, they just get things in a way that is difficult for adults to understand. It's that amazing childlike faith.

Yes, the first graders served communion. And not only did it mean a lot to them, it brought some of us adults to tears.

And yes, the second graders and kindergartener spoke the words of institution over the bread and cup. Did they know what they were saying? Yep! And watching the light in their eyes during this experience certainly made the moment mean even more to me.

But the best part of our communion experience, to me, was watching our tiny kiddos bravely stand in front of the rest of the campers (who were ALL older than my group) and lead the camp's favorite communion song, Sanctuary. This was the first time that most of the kids in my small group had heard this song (and we practiced a lot during our small group time to learn it!). But their sparkle and joy was certainly contageous! All the "big" kids joined in, and carried the song on. What a wonderful worship moment.

On a personal note, what a treasure it was for me to be served communion by my own little first graders that I teach at school and in Sunday School. And what a treat for me to offer them communion at the end of the service, as they had offered communion to the large group and waited patiently for kids and adults alike to partake.

"Lord, prepare me
to be a Sanctuary
pure and holy
tried and true
With thanksgiving
I'll be a living
Sanctuary
for You.
Lord, teach Your children
to stop their fighting,
start uniting,
live as one.
Let's get together
and live forever
as Sanctuaries
for You."

Small Groups and Ivy

I had such a good time yesterday evening, at the new women's meeting at church. Although calling it a meeting makes it seem like a drudgery, it is really fun! I think sometimes I just need to hang out with friends, in this case, no matter what age. Our group may be a Bible study of sorts, but it's also about getting together. It's about the support we feel from being with each other, sharing our concerns, laughing with each other, learning more about each other, and yes, learning from the Bible. And of course, eating snacks. :) We had about 5 at our first meeting, and we had 8 last night. Hopefully, even more will come in February, when the weather is nicer (maybe).

The best part of the evening, I think, was just being with other women. So often, the groups I'm with are either groups of both men & women, or groups of children. It's nice to just be with friends who know and understand you, and love you for who you are.

One thing we do at the end of the get-together involves an "invisible trinket". It's something that we imagine taking with us from the meeting, to think about for the rest of the month, until we get a new "treasure" at our next session. The trinket from last night was an ivy cutting (completely imaginary, but substantial). It's to remind me that a life of love is like an ivy: take care of it and it will grow, and you can share it with others. I totally love that thought!

We are studying a book, but I don't remember the name of it. The thing is, that part isn't really that important. The most important thing is being in the moment, knowing that you are loved and understood. And trust me, that's a God thing!